Our Mental Health ~ Journey of Our Lives

Welcome to this post on mental health! Apologies for not posting anything for a few days too, I’ve been busy. I also found a free flight simulator which I downloaded last night and has been so far real awesome!

So, I collaborated with another writer/poet who joined forces with me in the above Medium post so we could each write about our mental health, particularly depression. I am not putting this in writer spotlight as it is not featured on my site. I would also appreciate if you could clap and comment on Medium to show your support and to make the post more visible to others, so we can raise awareness and reduce the stigma associated with being depressed.

This last few years isolation, depression, and general poor mental health have been given a not so good reception, being completely and utterly ignored in those who need help. The system gives those with support more support, and does not support those in need with no support. You understand I hope, that the gravity of the situation is now out of control.

I once heard the actor Jim Carrey say that depression means your body is in need of a ‘deep rest.’ I agree, when you give it what it needs fundamentally, it can start to recover and heal.

Photo by Madison Inouye on Pexels.com

Would it be Nice

It would be nice to feel the sand under my feet

it would be nice to watch the clouds in the sky

and it would be nice if we could meet

and maybe not to spend any time to cry


would it be nice

or would it be wrong

if we could skate on ice

or just accept that we belong


it would be nice to see everything

perhaps never seeing anything

or just let it breeze away like nothing

at all had existed in my heart these days


would it be nice I used to ask

all I had to ask for, would it be.

Burgers are Sluts

She sits opposite me in this leather booth. The restaurant is fairly busy, waiters and waitresses flock from table to table, taking orders, delivering drinks and food and gossiping about social media nonsense. I daren’t reveal to this brunette bombshell that I am vegan, after she took the leap to tell me on the way here. “I’m vegan,” she had said. I didn’t want to share my intimate life details or let her feel some connection, because honestly, the whole date was a big set up. I’d agreed to this after being paired with this lady by a friend. Yeah, she was okay, she chatted a lot about family and decided to tell me about her recently holiday with her ‘girlfriends.’ Not that I was bothered though.

But… the waiter came over and I knew there was no way for me to hide my diet preference, and that was all it was, a way to stay slim and healthy. I don’t care about animal activism. I’d rather let her do all the talking, but I have to throw in the occasional question to sound interested. “Been there before?” She’s forgotten her own holiday already, and she talked about it for like 20 minutes. The waiter hovers over our table, pen on his pad. After viewing the menu, seeing the little choice there was for vegans, I decided to brave it.

“Yeah loads of times,” she finally responds, blushing and batting her eyelids. Damn, this woman is really into me and we’ve known each other for about an hour or two. Essentially a blind date. I give her the silent credit, she is busty, slim and tall. Her wit is questionable, after telling me I look like Colin Farrell. I look nothing like him and was born in Brighton to a mother who worked in a factory and alcoholic father who beat me as a child after his drunken nights out. Maybe being a Colin lookalike was the career change I needed. She glances to the menu and looks to the waiter, he’s young, probably early twenties and for some reason looking down her bra. Kid, take the order and **** off.

“I’ll have the vegan burger,” she says.

“Fries or onion rings?” he asks, smiling. Little jerk is jerking me around, can he not see she is on a date? I with hold my frustration and give him some leeway, as he probably hasn’t even reached puberty yet. “Okay great. An you sir?”

All can be forgiven, he’s addressed me by my master title, sir. Maybe I should correct him, to for the laughs. “Actually, it’s madam,” I say. The waiters face drops and he blushes. The young woman chuckles, and I get a leg up.

“Excuse me, madam.” So far so good, obedient waiter. “What would you like to order?” Oh dear the shame is built up, and I have to look at the menu, but cannot contain myself and splutter, laughing my ass off, she laughs again, and grabs my hand.

“Stop it,” she laughs. Her skin is smooth, her eyes magnetic blue. “What are you eating?”

I really was tempted to push it and order a portion of crisps, I didn’t have the mental energy now. “I’ll have the exact same, thank you.” The waiter takes the order and leaves without another word.

“So are you vegan then?” She smells of rose perfume and has that peaky, coloured tone in her cheeks. Do I confess my intimate details to a stranger? It wouldn’t go anywhere anyway.

“No, but I thought I’d try it.”

“You should be, it’s great.” Oh no, que the long animals abuse rant. I cut her off as she goes to speak.

“Do you want to know a fun fact about burgers?” She draws closer, smiling, her pearly whites glisten under the dim light.

“I’d love to.”

“Well,” I say, hesitating. “Burgers are sluts.” She pulls away, flushed. “They told me they like to be eaten out.” I expect her to laugh, but oh well, there she goes, from the table and out the door. I enjoy the moment and thank God I didn’t have to dump her.


Space

Finally in space. “Ship loaded, engines are hot.” You said once upon a time that the view from the earth was an illusion, and that the stars above merely reflections.

“I was preparing you for today, my son.” The day the moon bound ship would launch from the Bahamas. Bound for the stars, abound with glory and secret alien treats.

“Do you see the throttles so gold and the starboard points so clear?” In a blip to be shot into the stratosphere, all care washes away.

“Future now, future past, we are living, at last.”

Sand in My Eyes

Now we were not always like a ring fitting so comfortably on anothers finger

or a sun shining through clouds on a mild spring day

there were echoes of your pain inflicted onto me

my intentions pure and like honey

you stole my honey and you drained my will

just so you could take a big paper payment 'bill'

money always meant more to you

and I was feeling

because what I felt was real, even if you didn't

seeing that you are a deliberate choke

imagining that you had the killing joke

but my heart had to overcome your deceit

know this you sugar coated thorn bush

even with the threat of death, I would not have succumbed to this

even with God not answering my calls, I would not have ever fallen

you know the damage and you left it unfinished

apologies that flew like pigs

a hand that I knew, hid in the mist

I'm not crying, I have sand in my eyes.


Please consider reading ‘Your Eyes’ published in 2020.


If by Rudyard Kipling (really inspirational)

If you can keep your head when all about you   

    Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,   

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

    But make allowance for their doubting too;   

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

    Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

    And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;   

    If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;   

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

    And treat those two impostors just the same;   

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

    Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

    And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

    And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings

    And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

    To serve your turn long after they are gone,   

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

    Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,   

    Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,

    If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

    With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,   

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,   

    And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

Evenings Musing

How do you feel at the end of the day? Welcome to this evening post by Psychedelic Wizard. This blog will cover poetry, some info on my new short story, and some interesting facts… but not in that order.

Bring some life into your home! Plants are like ‘essential’ to have in your living spaces. The oxygenation and the vibrant life force are surely enough to strengthen anybody’s weary soul.

This is a dracaena and I recently got one for my birthday. They make lovely additions and are quite chatty.

Increasing the green space can boost mental clarity and help alleviate some of the symptoms associated with depression and anxiety. For example I notice I don’t feel so alone when surrounded by flowers or plants. Don’t let the idea of this put you off, you don’t need a jungle to feel the effects, which are very real indeed.

Poem to close the evening is called: Sundown

Sundown – Acrostic

So as the evening flows like cool air
under the wood bank lay the coal diggers
not to be charged until day
does not make it any less okay
or an owl that fleets its wings
winding down the fig leaf makeshift crew
not even close to have known you 

Have a read of the dark thrilling romance/erotic short story ‘Discovery Avenue’ with a new part added daily, sometimes more! Feedback always welcomed especially on the platform itself. If you are happy and enjoyed this post then please like, comment and follow my blog to support great content! Also check out my book Beach Town: Hope for a free copy of the eBook for a limited time!

Discovery Avenue – TMaxHarrison – Wattpad

Illinois Gal

Small town girl
on the streets of Illinois
from Chicago or Springfield
to the white house
a woman of passion
letters that tell of heart ache
a façade that decorates the makeup 
just the gal that nobody noticed
until she touched the top
and then everybody wanted to know

If you’d like to read or continue with my new romance/lustful short story ‘Discovery Avenue’ then click the link below. Part 3 has just been added, which is quite brutal. Peter is in the grips of a dark night, and his carnal desires are causing him to put his own life in danger without even realising it. Is it karma or is it fate? Each short episode or part is released daily.

https://www.wattpad.com/story/307873965-discovery-avenue

~ * If you enjoyed this post then please like, comment, follow and subscribe to my blog for more great content. I’d love to hear your short stories or your real life stories so connect below! Feel free to post links to your works too.


GRAB THE EBOOK FOR BEACH TOWN: HOPE FOR FREE UNTIL FRIDAY! LIMITED EASTER OFFER. IS FREE ON KINDLE UNLIMITED AND EBOOK.

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