To be born from the womb of the mother who has not developed a bond to love with the child who sits in the darkened room alone and counting the days blend to night or call on the God to answer his call a solemn melancholy denial of the hurt and lackluster suffering that broke his soul to reach into the pit... where he could reveal the brilliant beauty the face of an angel sent from aether "hold my hand tight" and let me be loved now where the swan graces the shimmer of lake feather dropped onto the brimstone water secret boundary, eternal longing
Now we were not always like a ring fitting so comfortably on anothers finger or a sun shining through clouds on a mild spring day there were echoes of your pain inflicted onto me my intentions pure and like honey you stole my honey and you drained my will just so you could take a big paper payment 'bill' money always meant more to you and I was feeling because what I felt was real, even if you didn't seeing that you are a deliberate choke imagining that you had the killing joke but my heart had to overcome your deceit know this you sugar coated thorn bush even with the threat of death, I would not have succumbed to this even with God not answering my calls, I would not have ever fallen you know the damage and you left it unfinished apologies that flew like pigs a hand that I knew, hid in the mist I'm not crying, I have sand in my eyes.
Please consider reading ‘Your Eyes’ published in 2020.
If by Rudyard Kipling (really inspirational)
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:
If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!
The body is made from flesh and blood and bone but my mind is a precious moment feels everything and everyone so when you call my name from the mountain tops and I see your smile which makes my stomach drop you have thought and love on your lips soothing to the ears metal that smacks the rocks a word or a fleeting threat destruction inner turmoil yet, you don't consider how they feel
You have conscious thought and choosing that for negativity or to hurt others is not kind. To choose to say something with the intention of causing distress, to bully, to intimidate or to demean, shouldn’t be encouraged. Even comments you consider to be fairly ‘okay’ can cause others upset. A lot of people don’t express that hurt and they just move on. But think about that. It isn’t a control mechanism, it is respect for others which most people learn through childhood. I don’t think there is a place for deliberate hurt in this world or the next. Community doesn’t rely on one person. So, when one person is the negative source of hurt, cut them off. It can be painful, but better separated from the cause than be a part of it through blind acceptance.
Deep thickening walls of desperation misty heart and love the deception shattered glass broken pieces lay untouched on the sand light gleams from its smooth surface retrieving waves setting sun stood alone in the desert heart has fallen from its swinging basket reaching upwards opening your eyes waterfall of soul bearing for the saints forgive me, forgive you moving shifting the dream that paved a thousand nightmares grinding relieving being in the present I feel that lust rise from the ashes as phoenix I am the storm coming to reckon on the horizon
Thank you for reading this post.